Let me analyse once again. (I hope Sonja won't be reading this because yesterday, as I got into it, she told me, annoyed, to stoppit.)
But she's not here right now so here I go again.
First of all, most of you know perfectly well that I simply cannot get him off my mind. Maybe it was about time I had a crush on someone real, I don't know. One way or another, it's here and I'm dealing with it. As exciting as it was a few days ago when we "talked", it's freaking me out now. And I have only one person to blame: myself. It's just the way I am. I never knew how to sit back and enjoy the ride. Oh no. I have always been the type that keeps asking why this and why that, how to get where I want and how to get there immediately. No patience whatsoever. And I know very well that's not the way these things work.
Another thing I do but is completely wrong is projecting. What do I mean? Well, I start imagining things. I give them characteristic they only posses in my mind. Maybe because I don't know them so I have to basically make them up, but maybe because I simply want them to be these people I have in my mind. So in this particular case, rationally, I know he simply cannot be the person I think he is but I still can't help myself. Is it then any wonder I get sick and tired of boys when I discover they can't live up to my expectations? I suppose not.
Then, I start to imagine things. So this is what it all comes down to: instead of enjoying the fact that I finally, after a long long time, have a crush on someone I actually talked to, someone I actually met, someone I might actually touch some day... instead of all that, I drive myself crazy obsessing over something I have no control over and something I have most likely only imagined.
Why can't I be normal? Why?
But she's not here right now so here I go again.
First of all, most of you know perfectly well that I simply cannot get him off my mind. Maybe it was about time I had a crush on someone real, I don't know. One way or another, it's here and I'm dealing with it. As exciting as it was a few days ago when we "talked", it's freaking me out now. And I have only one person to blame: myself. It's just the way I am. I never knew how to sit back and enjoy the ride. Oh no. I have always been the type that keeps asking why this and why that, how to get where I want and how to get there immediately. No patience whatsoever. And I know very well that's not the way these things work.
Another thing I do but is completely wrong is projecting. What do I mean? Well, I start imagining things. I give them characteristic they only posses in my mind. Maybe because I don't know them so I have to basically make them up, but maybe because I simply want them to be these people I have in my mind. So in this particular case, rationally, I know he simply cannot be the person I think he is but I still can't help myself. Is it then any wonder I get sick and tired of boys when I discover they can't live up to my expectations? I suppose not.
Then, I start to imagine things. So this is what it all comes down to: instead of enjoying the fact that I finally, after a long long time, have a crush on someone I actually talked to, someone I actually met, someone I might actually touch some day... instead of all that, I drive myself crazy obsessing over something I have no control over and something I have most likely only imagined.
Why can't I be normal? Why?
6 spoke back:
ok, ovo vjerojatno nece pomoc, ali... kak se ono zove? socijalna podrska ili tak nest? kad znas da nisi jedini pa ti bude lakse? aaa, znas sta mislim... ugl, ja imam iste simptome. there. to je sve sto sam htjela rec. ko da nisam mogla sam tak napisat. ubi me ovaj prekid s jozom.
Ti imaš iste simptome? Zbog Joze? Ili općenito?
Hvala na podršci, u svakom slučaju. Ubit ću se.
nemoj, nemoj... ma opcenito. (ipak ne zbog imaginarnih decki...)
Girl,
You know how to get a woman all worried after a weekend of no internet access.
First of all: From reading that convo, I gather he IS interested in you. And yes, for sex. Guys are always in it for the sex first. How about you try to chat with him more often to find out about him, so you don't have to make up his qualities? Just ask him real questions on real topics. If he gets bored that way, you have your answer. If not, you have your answer too but it will be a better one. Then you can decide if you want to date him.
And those abstract reasonings about 'do I want to date?' Sheesh! Dating and relationships are never abstract or faceless. Deal with it one person at the time. The question is: do you want to get to know HIM better. Your answer is YES.
Bel
Oh Kriss. I feel your pain.I have spent most of my life in crushes. It's painful and exhilarating at the same time. Especially if you don't know the guy that well. And God help you if he is NICE to you! You get your hopes all up and begin to feel special and think "maybe" and then you realize he is like that with everybody. Then you just feel foolish.
Now I said all that to say, it seems to me he does like you. Just try to not bug out, take it slow and see where it leads. You're a terrific person. Don't let foolish people or yourself convince you otherwise.
How about you try to chat with him more often to find out about him, so you don't have to make up his qualities?
I'm trying, Bel, I really am, but it's not easy since I DON'T HAVE HIS NUMBER NOR DOES HE HAVE MINE! Is that supposed to tell me something?!
And God help you if he is NICE to you! You get your hopes all up and begin to feel special and think "maybe" and then you realize he is like that with everybody. Then you just feel foolish.
Oh Nic, you DO understand me!!! Thank you.
Post a Comment