Saturday 19 January 2008

Toast Making 101

My mother is unbelievable. I was making myself some toast and then, of course, she wanted some. (I cannot fucking believe that whenever I get something for myself to eat, someone else comes and wants the exact same thing. Of course, I have to make it since I'm like already there and shit.) So OK, I sliced 4 slices of bread for her and made the toast and left then she decides she wants more and I was like: Well you're obviously up from the bed now so you might as well make it yourself. so she did. And then I hear her yelling for me from the kitchen: Kristinaaaaaaaa! It's burning!! It's burning!!! So I go over there and duh!, it's burning cuz she sliced the bread too goddamn thick and it couldn't pop out. I mean really, how hard it is to slice the bread for toast? Apparently - very. So I'm like: What the hell? How did it even go in there? I shoved it, she said. No shit. And I'm supposed to dig it out? How exactly? Maybe it'll fall out if I turn it over, she said then. Yeah, you cannot pull it out, but it's gonna fall out on its own? Suuure, let's do that.
OK, let's get this straight: if the toast doesn't slip in, the odds of it falling out are pretty slim. Getting it out shouldn't involve none of the following: a spatula, a fork, a fork and a knife, a screwdriver and especially a hammer that I just saw my father bring in.
So what happened? As far as I know, the bread is still in the toaster. (Oh and before one of you Americans go all crazy about slicing the bread ourselves instead of buying already sliced kind: it's too damn expensive.) Guess none of us is gonna be having toast again any time soon. I can't believe I'm related to these people.

See? It's supposed to pop out! On its own! The popping out
should not involve any kind of tool!
Unless, of course, a tool shoves it in.

7 spoke back:

Anonymous said...

Hi. la. ri. ous. But not so much when you have to live it, I guess. LMAO

Krissie said...

No, actually, it was hilarious. I couldn't laugh, obviously, at that particular moment, but last night I came to the kitchen with a Toast, anyone?.

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
ROFLMFAO!!!!!

by any chance from hell, is your mom related to mine?

EXCELLENT!

Krissie said...

God, I hope not. I hate most of my relatives, I hope you're not one of them.

Sukhaloka said...

LMAO.
Crazy life you lead :D

Anonymous said...

... FUCK OFF!!!!

D-HOR said...

Oh good LORRRRRDDD. For serious? Oh my Gawd. Couldn't she have unplugged it and fished it out with a butter knife? But NO she had to SHOW you? And make YOU get it out?? ahahahahahahahaah Good lord I'd be too ASHAMED to tell anyone! lol :)