Sign Me! I'm So Pretty!

You know how people come to one's door trying to sell something? They talk really fast and make it sound really appealing and awesome and oh so cheap and shit? Sometimes it's kitchen knives or sheets or pots or books or some kind of a service... Sometimes people come to one's door and try to convince on to switch one's phone company.
Well.
Sometimes "one" is my mother.
I don't generally consider my mother to be stupid. In fact, she's rather smart and doesn't often fall for crap people serve her. Usually. Today however...
Today my mother almost deprived me of my INTERNET. And you all know that when it comes to me, Internet = life. So.
Two women rang our doorbell and my mother went out. Before I continue, you should know that we usually get rid of these people trying to sell us stuff like IMMEDIATELY. So when my mother walked in about 5 minutes later holding a SIGNED CONTRACT in her hand and looking kinda proud, the alarm in my head went off. And boy, was my head alarm right!
She switched phone companies. To get cheaper prices. OK, that sounds reasonable, one might think. Yeah, it does.
Unless one's (one = ME!) Internet isn't connected to a certain phone company. That one's (again, one = ME!) mother just decided to switch from.
THOU SHALL NOT DEPRIVE ME OF MY INTERNET! EVER!
What have you done?, I asked in a strange voice.
They said it would make our phone bill smaller, she said.
Uh-huh, I nodded. And what about the Internet?
Uh... There was a dawning on her face followed by a look of horror.
So I got on the phone, called Sonja, who called her friend who works at our apparently-soon-to-be-ex phone company, who informed her that if we were indeed to switch companies, they would disconnect me.
THOU SHALL NOT DEPRIVE ME OF MY INTERNET! EVER!
So tomorrow my mother is going to go and break that contract. It'll cost her though. Not an absurd amount of money but still.
You hear of people being scammed. Old people. Illiterate people. Extremely stupid people.
Well allow me to introduce you to my mother. Hey, everyone, this is my mother! She's the woman who came in with a signed contract about which she said this: Oh I don't really know what it says. I didn't have my glasses with me when I signed it so I couldn't read it.
Trust me, I wish I made this up.