Tuesday, 27 April 2010

Krissie's Book Club

Well okay, I'm not Oprah, therefore I don't actually have a book club. I do, however, have a book I'd like to introduce to you. Lo and behold! (I don't actually know what that means, but it seemed appropriate.)


RAZOR WIRE PUBIC HAIR is the touching tale of a living, breathing, thinking, sex toy that is hopelessly in love with its owner who views it as little more than an object.


It's not as bad as you thought, right? It's a little on the wacky side, but kinda endearing nonetheless.

Yeah well, keep on reading.

Imagine a world without men where the only way a woman can reproduce is with the help of a giant computerized incubator and a genetically engineered sex toy. Now imagine that this sex toy is intelligent. It has emotions and a soul. It hopes and dreams and it falls in love. This is the premise of Carlton Mellick III's RAZOR WIRE PUBIC HAIR. One of the main characters "The Sister" is a nymphomaniac who is covered from head to toe in vaginas. Celsia is an Amazon warrior with pubic hair made of razor wire. The main character is a genetically engineered hermaphrodite sex toy named Celsia 2 who longs to be loved by his/her owner. Oh, but wait, there's more ... there's sex starved zombies, hordes of marauding rapists, twat frogs, a hoota beasts that is basically just a big hairy vagina with legs, and still another giant talking and apparently quite wise vagina built into the wall of the mansion in which many of these creatures reside.


I'll leave you with that.

13 spoke back:

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

"a touching tale" huh?

??????

So, did you read it??? :D

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

OOoo and I'm curious - and you of all people would know - (compliment btw) are there places to read or dowload books like there are music? (you know, but for free?) I've found sites that offer free online books for free on purpose because they're LAME, but I want GOOD books. Is there such a thing?

Krissie said...

LOL, no, I haven't read it.

Yeah, there are audiobooks to steal on the Internet, though they're harder to find now that stupid American justice system banned Mininova from providing us illegal downloads.

But they still exist at places, only not as well organised as they were there. If you know what you'd like to listen, I can search for it in case it's been recorded.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

bastard americans

and lol i knew you'd know! :)

but i don't want to bug you with searching, i'd just adore some site refs.

p.s. typing one handed with a squirmy baby in ones lap proves to be difficult.

Sgt said...

The book sounds like P0rns evil step-sister.

I'll have to pass on this recommendation. If I'm dreaming about vagina, I certainly don't want it giant and harry and attacking me.

Krissie said...

I can't rec you sites, Lindy. Didn't you read what I wrote? The organised one was banned, and the rest are a mess.

LOL, Sgt, that was hardly a recommendation, more like a warning.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Snippy McGee, you must be more upset about your poor stuffed animal that I thought! Poor lil guy. ;D and yes I read what you wrote goofball, I just don't want you to have to bother, just point me in some sort of direction. (direction for a retard that is) :D

Krissie said...

Well, I use torrents, so I'm pointing you to Isohunt and Torrentz.

Sgt said...

So when should we expect your book out Krissie?

English translated of course...

Anonymous said...

Oh, the metaphors!

*puts on smart glasses*

*takes them off 'cos really who am I kidding here?*

Still, I'd like to read it, even though I probably won't get it. Sounds interestingly weird.

Krissie said...

LOL I'm not planning to write a book, Sgt. Especially not one focused on pubes.

What's not to get, SM? It's VAGINAAAAAS!

darth sardonic said...

um call me old-fashioned, but i am guessing razor wire pubic hair might be counter-productive, or at the very least, not much fun for anyone. not even the amazon warrior. could you imagine rolling over onto your stomach in your sleep? *gulps nervously*

Krissie said...

OH MY GOD, that didn't even come to mind! DO NOT WANT.