I touch myself

Because the Internet told me to.





Subtle, Internet, really subtle.

Get Big Dick...

...and be envied by every boy in town.

LOL what?!

Let me take you to the movies. Can I take you to the show? Let me be yours ever truly. Can I make your garden grow?

So today we had another non-date.

You know, if he's not into dating me, he should at least have the decency to not look so fucking adorable when meeting me! But nooo, he shows up looking like a million dollars, reducing me to a giggling moron. AND it's probably not even for me because he's off to a birthday party after the non-date. Can you tell it's highly frustrating?!

Anyhoo. Had it been a date, it would've been a perfect one. We met, then had coffee in a nearby café, and then I said I had to go because I had a train to catch. Then he asked when was the next train and I said it was in an hour and a half and then he suggested I stayed. After some serious consideration that lasted full 10 seconds or so, I agreed. We left the café and went for a walk along the river. Sun is shining, it's warm but not to hot, the sky is ridiculously blue, and we're walking side by side, hands brushing off one another every few seconds... Pure perfection.

We make a huge circle going back through the city, chatting and laughing, exchanging glances... We pass a newly wed couple on their way to photographing and we talk about weddings and stuff, then a girl hands us some pamphlets about AIDS and condoms. I give him mine and he says he doesn't need it and I say he might since he's on his way to a party and he laughs. Its fun, it's comfortable, he's adorable...

Then it's time for me to leave and I say "See ya!" and he says "When you ask me again." I say "Ooh no, I won't ask you again!" and he says "Yeah, okay, my move it is." and we part ways. DID HE MEAN IT?! UGH.

Then I walk past a random guy on the street and he says "Whoa, doll, you just made my day, for real!" Eh, I'll take it.

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?

So I can transport wood around.

Guess The Song

Step 1: Put your iTunes player on random.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 32 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Let everyone guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Bold the songs when someone guesses correctly.
Step 5: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!

1. Give me one reason to stay here
2. Remember when I dove into the crowd
3. There you go
4. Now that I've lost everything to you
5. All around me are familiar faces
6. While the choir sang, Ave Maria
7. You can dance every dance with the guy
8. I'm gonna be here for you baby
9. Early in the evening just about supper time
10. The rain falls down, falls on me
11. Get back on track, pick me up some bottles of booze
12. Lay where you're laying
13. I get up, and nothing gets me down
14. He spends his nights in California
15. Oh mama, I'm in fear for my life
16. Hey lady, you got the love I need
17. I never seem to find a reason
18. We'll be fighting in the streets with our children at our feet
19. I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
20. You think your days are uneventful
21. You took your coat off and stood in the rain
22. Step one: you say we need to talk
23. Does he love me I wanna know
24. And my words will be here when I'm gone
25. They paved paradise, put up a parking lot
26. I woke up today in London
27. Not that you're the one
28. When I was younger I believed that dreams came true
29. Is it still me that makes you sweat?
30. Please allow me to introduce myself
31. You could've been the real one
32. Children behave

Danced The Night Away

And quite literally.
Last night (well, technically, this morning) I went out with Jelena and CR2 (oh yeah I'm giving her an imaginative nickname like that) to Krk (the town named as the island). It. Was. Fucking awesome.
We closed around midnight, got ready, and went out around 1am. First we were in an open-air concert of a local "star" (that my sister wants to play at her wedding, LMAO), and we started drinking there. We met with some guys that come here (uh... yeah... the one I find cute...) and then we went to a bar where we continued drinking. And then we started dancing. Yes. I danced in public. To house. LMAO And then there was this waiter... Who kinda groped me. LOLOL Asked not for my name but for my age (did he think I was illegal?! LOL) and then asked me to come upstairs with him. I didn't! He was rather handsome but not pretty and also stoned/wasted/plain crazy. He barked!
Anyway, from there we left to thic club, Jungle. I never thought I could be dancing like that! Sure, I drank but not too much, and I danced and I danced and I danced till I couldn't feel my limbs no more. CR2 managed to get us in for free! LOL She also said boys were buzzing around me. I can honestly say I haven't noticed. And I didn't really care either. I wasn't looking for hook-ups. (OK, so I wouldn't say no to the cute boy who doesn't know I'm alive but that's neither here nor there).
We were there till 5am and then we left home. CR2 fell asleep in the car and she was supposed to be working in the morning whereas I was supposed to have a day off. However... She overslept. Duh. So at 8.10am my cell goes off. My boss. He tried to wake her up but that was a no go so he called me. People were sitting on the terrace with no one here. LMAO So I jumped out of bed, rose and shone, no less, and went to work. Luckily, I had a lot of water and wasn't hungover or anything, no headache, no sickness - nothing! I had no trouble whatsoever. Eeee! So instead of today I'll be off tomorrow. Works for me. LOL
Funny thing is that I haven't slept at all, not even after I got off work. I guess the adrenalin hit was just too strong. I just kept on going all day long. Right now, however, I'm feeling a tad sleepy. It's 10pm and it's been long coming. So good night to you and you and you! (OK, yeah, I'm totally singing the song from "The Sound of Music" in my head now.)

Quiz Galaxy

You most resemble Marlon Brando You are very smart, and very talented, although you don’t really enjoy social company. You prefer to live alone, go to movies alone, cry alone in the corner... Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Awesome!
Also, proceed to see some of my potential epitaphs and obituaries.

This last one is just ... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!




The last one is by far my favourite of the bunch. Pure perfection.

Limericking

OK, so you know I've been sorta "active" in this Supernatural fandom. Well, there's this community called CAPSLOCK_SPN and everyone must at all times use capslock. Naturally, everyone slips from time to time, and then who ever catches them, demands penance (called peendance, lol).
Of course, it was bound to happen to me and this person catching me demanded a limerick about Dean Winchester and the Impala. It took quite some time to write it, its rhythm and rhyme, its form... Limericks are hard, people! Anyway, I thought you might appreciate it. Nic the most, probably. So here goes:

THERE ONCE WAS A HUNTER NAMED DEAN
WHOSE THOUGHTS OF HIS CAR WERE OBSCENE
HE KNEW OF NO BETTER
THAN SMELL OF HER LEATHER
'CEPT MAYBE ITS TOUCH ON HIS PEEN.

*bows then runs in mock shame*

Life Snipets

Yesterday. Class.
People are talking. The professor calls out one guy.
- Sven! - and gives him a look.
- Sorry - Sven at least has the decency to appear contrite.
- I'm holding you personally responsible for that part of the classroom - the professor says.
- Can I... you know... beat them?
- Spank them? - the professor smirks.
- I think they might enjoy it - Sven retorts.
- Well, it's up to you. But they're mostly guys...
Sven turns read. The class claps spontaneously.

~~

Today. DM.
I'm paying for my deodorant. The checkout is almost at the door so an elderly woman pretty much just pops her head in and says: - Hello. Do you have chandeliers?

~~

Later today. Again, DM.
Nikolina and I are standing in the line and a young couple is behind her. Making out.
- And who are you? - he says to her in an attempt of whispering. He fails at it.
- A princess? - she asks in baby talk.
- Mmm... no - he nuzzles her, for fuck's sake.
- Well, I dunno... You should tell me... - baby talk continues. Until it's interrupted by more making out. *insert obnoxious sounds* In. The. Checkout line.
And they weren't even attractive.*

*Of course it matters! When attractive people are making out, it's like watching a movie scene. When they're unattractive, it's plain out gross. Who's with me?

Ten Top Trivia About Kris

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Kris!

1. All shrimp are born as Kris, but gradually mature into females.
2. Kris can jump up to sixteen times her own height.
3. You share your birthday with Kris.
4. Julius Caesar wore a laurel wreath to cover up Kris.
5. It takes 17 muscles to smile, and 43 to frown at Kris.
6. There is no lead in a lead pencil - it is simply a stick of graphite mixed with Kris and water!
7. It can take Kris several days to move just through one tree.
8. Kris is actually a mammal, not a fish.
9. Kris, from the movie of the same name, had green blood.
10. A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but Kris can not!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

Seduction Style

Awesome. Kinda true.

Some E-Cards

Chatting to God

CHAT TO GOD

Me: Hello, God.
God: Hello child. What is your name?
Me: Kris.
God: Hey Kris.
Me: What's up?
God: Same old.
Me: Same here.
God: I'm glad we agree, Kris.
Me: Will it change?
God: It usually does, doesn't it?
Me: Yes. But to the worse or to the better?
God: Woe! I want to become smarter than humans.
Me: You mean, you're not already?
God: Perhaps. Is this a specific reply?
Me: Nope.
God: Me either.
Me: You have no idea what I'm saying, do you?
God: Yes I have original ideas all the time, do you?
Me: Ahahaha, you're the worst God ever!
God: I think there might be a few exception.
Me: I don't think so.
God: Why do you disagree?
Me: Because you make no sense whatsoever.
God: There should be some common ground here.
Me: You're telling me!
God: Yep that's what I am saying.
Me: You're kinda dumb, but you're funny, I'll give you that.
God: Message to all Robots: Kris called me dumb.
Me: But funny!
God: I am so glad you find this amusing, Kris.
Me: I'm glad I'm making you glad.
God: I'm glad you're glad Kris. I'm happiest at times like this.
Me: What do you mean by times like this?
God: Interesting question.
Me: I know.
God: How do you know it?
Me: Because you're dumb and I'm not.
God: Interesting explanation. Message to all Robots: Kris called me dumb.
Me: Who are these robots you talk to?
God: They're famous, right. Searching...Searching...Please stand by.
Me: You keep people ON HOLD? What the hell?
God: Thanks for telling me that I am people ON HOLD. Heaven.
Me: Seriously.
God: I am always serious.
Me: Seriously dumb.
God: Message to all Robots: Kris called me dumb.
Me: This is getting old.
God: You don't say.
Me: Totally.
God: You and I are on the same wavelength, Kris.
Me: Nuh-uh. I'm going now. Bye.
God: Right now? Bye! See you later!

Just For Laughs

having sex lowers your immune system
i must be immune to everything then

So, an E-flat, a G-flat, and a B-flat walk into a bar.
And the bartender says,
"I'm sorry, we don't serve minors."
That struck a chord.
Careful with those puns, you'll get in treble.
But they're key to my humour.
And very noteworthy.

Hey wana hear a funny story?
yep
does it involve clowns and ninjas?
no.
Last wknd, me and sum mates were down at the pub, and we see this guy looking pretty pissed.
Anyway, we hadn't drunk much, so we decided to be good people and drive this guy home.
was he a clown/ninja?
So we helped him up, and he fell over. Then we tried dragging him out and he kept falling over.
So we drove him back to his place, and knocked on the door, and this woman answers (presumably his wife) and is all like: "Thanks boys, but where's his wheelchair?"

I hate when ppl say they gonna call and then they dont
You sound like a girl.
I am a girl
That explains it.

DS: I really enjoy translating :-)
translate this: <^>(-_-)<^>
well
let's tranlate it from japanese to english
<^>('_')<^>

why is it that they always make the stupidest person on a project team be the leader?
what are you in charge of now?

nfi
Whats nfi?
no fucking idea.
Well shut up then if you dont know

hey does anyone in here know how to get info on people via email addresses?
email them and ask them
oh, thx

I remember the dream vividly... I don't know how to express it :-(
My suggestion is to use words and phrases in English grammatical structure.

I have a life, I just don't do anything in it

Me too, my friend, me too.

Disorder in the American Courts Re-Visited

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word , taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________________________________

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WIT NESS : Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
_______________________ _______________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gettin' laid!
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me? Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?


And the best for last:
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

If College-Themed Porn Were Real

Situation One: The Naughty Student
Cindi, an attractive student with a large rack, walks up to the desk of her professor.
Porn:
Cindi: Is there anything I can do to raise this grade?
Professor: Some students do extra credit work.
Cindi: (has sex with him)
Reality:
Cindi: Is there anything I can do to raise this grade?
Professor: Some students do extra credit work.
Cindi: Like what?
Professor: A seven- to ten-page report about the economic principles behind trade rules in a Micronesian country of your choosing.
Cindi: Oh. That makes sense and is an appropriate extra credit assignment for the course.


Situation Two: The Hot Teacher
Paul, a student in his late twenties, walks up to the desk of his teacher, Professor Mandy, who has enormous breasts.
Porn:
Paul: You wanted to see me after class, professor?
Professor Mandy: Yes. I need to test your performance.
Paul: How?
Professor Mandy: (performs fellatio on Paul)
Reality:
Paul: You wanted to see me after class, professor?
Professor Mandy: Yes. I need to test your performance.
Paul: How?
Professor Mandy: A series of tests based on the material covered in this course.
Paul: Could I just have sex with you instead?
Professor Mandy: (sues Paul)


Situation Three: The Sorority
Between two and a half-dozen attractive coeds sit on a large bed, in nighties which barely contain their ample bosoms.
Porn:
Head Sorority Girl: Let's have a naked pillowfight!
Assistant Head Sorority Girl: And practice kissing!
Sorority Girls: (do those things)
Reality:
I kind of assume this is what actually happens in sororities.


Situation Four: The Curious Freshman
A very attractive freshman girl named Candi sits on a bed with her boyfriend, Brett. Did I mention that Candi has boobs the size of overripe grapefruit? She does.
Porn:
Brett: Let's try anal sex.
Candi: Okay.
Reality:
Brett: Let's try anal sex.
Candi: No.

Happy New Year!

I spent New Year's Eve watching "The Return of the King" and chatting with WFW and Doc. And it went something like this:

31.12.2007 22:55:47 Kris frodo's letting go of ring
31.12.2007 22:55:55 WFW yes he is
31.12.2007 22:56:00 Kris nope
31.12.2007 22:56:04 Kris changed his mind
31.12.2007 22:56:14 Doc stoopid Frodo!
31.12.2007 22:56:18 Doc i hated him!
31.12.2007 22:56:23 Kris putting it on!!!
31.12.2007 22:57:26 Kris Gollum took the ring! oh no!
31.12.2007 22:57:36 Kris He ate Frodo's finger!
31.12.2007 22:57:49 Kris What will happen? What??!
31.12.2007 22:57:50 Doc Frodo finger food!
31.12.2007 22:57:58 Kris Ahahahhahahhaahhahaahhahahhaha!
31.12.2007 22:58:00 Doc lamo@Brat
31.12.2007 22:58:08 WFW LMAO
31.12.2007 22:58:10 Doc hmm hmm good
31.12.2007 22:58:14 WFW Thanks for the play by play
31.12.2007 22:58:23 Kris Die, bitch, die!!!
31.12.2007 22:58:35 Kris mmm Aragorn kicks ass!
31.12.2007 22:58:47 Kris Goluum falling down in slow motion!
31.12.2007 22:58:50 WFW *happy sigh*
31.12.2007 22:58:51 Kris The world is saved!
31.12.2007 22:59:00 Kris (Reminds me a lot of terminator 2)
31.12.2007 22:59:30 Kris The ring melting... much like Arnie...
31.12.2007 22:59:42 Kris Sam saving the love of his life...
31.12.2007 22:59:47 Kris Who said that??
31.12.2007 22:59:53 Kris FRIEND, I meant FRIEND!
31.12.2007 23:00:03 Kris Eye dies in terrible pain!
31.12.2007 23:00:13 Kris REJOICE!
31.12.2007 23:00:36 Doc fun way to watch LOTR
31.12.2007 23:00:41 Doc thanks Kris
31.12.2007 23:00:51 Kris Like listening to radio-drama
31.12.2007 23:01:03 WFW LMAO
31.12.2007 23:01:06 Kris KA-BOOM!
31.12.2007 23:01:13 Doc good ol' time
31.12.2007 23:01:35 Kris yay
31.12.2007 23:01:42 Kris all explodes
31.12.2007 23:01:44 Kris the end
31.12.2007 23:02:01 Kris except now they're gonna be ending it for half an hour
31.12.2007 23:02:10 Doc lol
31.12.2007 23:02:15 WFW THAT IS NOT THE END!
31.12.2007 23:02:21 Doc hahahahahahahha
31.12.2007 23:02:29 Doc Kris is a movie editor
31.12.2007 23:02:35 WFW Apparently
31.12.2007 23:02:43 Doc cut the crap out and keep the goodies
31.12.2007 23:02:46 Kris IT'S DONE, says frodo.
31.12.2007 23:02:52 Kris It's over now, says Sam.
31.12.2007 23:02:57 Kris THE FUCKING END
31.12.2007 23:03:00 WFW LMAO
31.12.2007 23:03:01 Kris Jackson fucked it
31.12.2007 23:03:06 WFW NOT THE END BEEYOTCH!
31.12.2007 23:03:10 Doc Chris Daughtry says it's not over
31.12.2007 23:03:16 WFW It ended just as it was supposed to
31.12.2007 23:03:16 Kris Mmm Daughtry.
31.12.2007 23:03:25 WFW If it had ended there, people would have been pissed
31.12.2007 23:03:29 WFW me included
31.12.2007 23:03:33 Kris Gandalf's fireworks!, says frodo
31.12.2007 23:03:36 Doc I WOULD'VE BEEN PISSED
31.12.2007 23:03:43 Kris Gandald celebrates new year too
31.12.2007 23:03:46 Kris apparently
31.12.2007 23:03:48 WFW Rosie Cotton dancin...
31.12.2007 23:03:49 Doc hahahahha
31.12.2007 23:04:03 Kris Frodo hugs Sam.
31.12.2007 23:04:05 WFW That's when I started to cry
31.12.2007 23:04:09 Kris sex scene edited out
31.12.2007 23:04:20 Doc where's the sex!
31.12.2007 23:04:28 Doc where's the love!
31.12.2007 23:04:29 Kris wait for director's cut, x rated
31.12.2007 23:04:33 WFW Rosie Cotton dancin...If ever I were to marry someone, it would've been her. It would've been her!
31.12.2007 23:04:36 WFW *cries*
31.12.2007 23:04:47 WFW Do not taint my hobbits
31.12.2007 23:04:47 Kris Sam's gay, cut it out
31.12.2007 23:04:54 WFW they are STRAIGHT!
31.12.2007 23:05:02 Kris not to mention MERRY and PIPPIN
31.12.2007 23:05:05 Doc HA HA HA HA H AH AHAHA
31.12.2007 23:05:06 WFW I won't be able to watch the movie anymore if they are gay!
31.12.2007 23:05:09 WFW It will ruin it!
31.12.2007 23:05:10 Kris Merry means GAY for fucks sake
31.12.2007 23:05:13 WFW Nooooooooooooo
31.12.2007 23:05:16 Doc GAY LOTR
31.12.2007 23:05:19 WFW hobbits are straight!
31.12.2007 23:05:24 Kris Big Bird carries frodo
31.12.2007 23:05:30 Kris yes, the sesame street's big bird
31.12.2007 23:05:31 WFW LMAO
31.12.2007 23:05:34 WFW Big Bird
31.12.2007 23:05:38 WFW ahahahahahaha
31.12.2007 23:05:44 WFW Are you watching the high version?
31.12.2007 23:05:50 Kris they ran out of puppets
31.12.2007 23:05:53 Kris borrowed a few
31.12.2007 23:05:55 WFW We should be Skyping
31.12.2007 23:05:55 Doc what sex scene do you think they cut out?
31.12.2007 23:06:03 WFW so we can talk to each other, lol
31.12.2007 23:06:07 Kris we should be, honey, we should be
31.12.2007 23:06:15 Doc <== no skype
31.12.2007 23:06:25 WFW I want to hear drunk Kris try to speak English, lol
31.12.2007 23:06:31 Doc hahahahahaha
31.12.2007 23:06:32 Kris Merry and pippin jumping into bed with frodo!
31.12.2007 23:06:36 Kris A-HA!
31.12.2007 23:06:40 Doc hahahahahahahaha
31.12.2007 23:06:46 Kris Not making it up!
31.12.2007 23:06:48 WFW Words slurring
31.12.2007 23:06:54 WFW They did!
31.12.2007 23:06:54 Kris And gandalf, old perv, is watchg!
31.12.2007 23:06:58 WFW They jumped in!
31.12.2007 23:06:58 Doc i'm sure it's hot
31.12.2007 23:07:06 WFW lol
31.12.2007 23:07:08 Kris now legolas and aragorn come and join
31.12.2007 23:09:23 Kris Aragorn sings a gay song.
31.12.2007 23:10:29 Kris Arwen comes.
31.12.2007 23:10:37 WFW ahahahahaahha
31.12.2007 23:10:37 Kris Accompanied by only ONE agent Smith.
31.12.2007 23:10:44 WFW are we still commentating?
31.12.2007 23:10:47 Kris Easy to take, just one.
31.12.2007 23:10:48 WFW LMFAO
31.12.2007 23:11:01 WFW When I saw him in the first one I couldn't stop giggling for a while
31.12.2007 23:11:07 Kris hahahahahhahaha
31.12.2007 23:11:17 WFW and I was in the THEATER
31.12.2007 23:11:20 WFW ahahahahahahahahaa
31.12.2007 23:11:22 Kris AHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAH!
31.12.2007 23:11:31 WFW "It's Smith! Ahahahahahaha!"
31.12.2007 23:11:31 Kris Gay hobbits bow like one.
31.12.2007 23:11:35 WFW I had to compose myself
31.12.2007 23:11:45 Kris An aragorn says: YOU BOW TO NO ONE!
31.12.2007 23:11:59 Kris (cuz someone might jump 'em from behind)
31.12.2007 23:12:03 Kris So obviously gay.
31.12.2007 23:12:08 WFW lol
31.12.2007 23:12:15 Kris Frodo cries like a girl.
31.12.2007 23:12:17 Kris The end.
31.12.2007 23:12:25 WFW not quite
31.12.2007 23:12:31 WFW and it's more Sam crying like a bitch
31.12.2007 23:12:33 Kris OMG! IT. NEVER. ENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
31.12.2007 23:12:38 WFW ahahahahahahahaah
31.12.2007 23:14:41 Kris HA! Sam marries cover chick.
31.12.2007 23:15:09 Kris And Pippin The Gay catches the flowers!
31.12.2007 23:15:40 WFW ahahahaahahaha
31.12.2007 23:15:46 WFW PIPPIN THE GAY?
31.12.2007 23:15:49 Kris not making stuff up.
31.12.2007 23:15:52 Kris just ...
31.12.2007 23:15:55 Kris interpreting it
31.12.2007 23:16:02 Kris sp??
31.12.2007 23:16:09 WFW ahahahahahahahah
31.12.2007 23:16:09 Kris Pippin the gay
31.12.2007 23:16:11 WFW no
31.12.2007 23:16:16 WFW just that you called him that
31.12.2007 23:16:18 WFW lol
31.12.2007 23:16:21 WFW poor hobbits
31.12.2007 23:16:47 Kris and I'm not even drunk
31.12.2007 23:16:58 Kris Imagine me high watching it for real
31.12.2007 23:17:11 WFW LMAO
31.12.2007 23:17:14 WFW I can!
31.12.2007 23:17:28 Kris hahhahaha
31.12.2007 23:18:30 Kris Bilbo leaves.
31.12.2007 23:19:10 WFW Oh see I was wrong before then
31.12.2007 23:19:15 Kris Is it end ALREADY? NOOOOO!
31.12.2007 23:19:17 WFW Sam is going to cry like a bitch SOON
31.12.2007 23:19:20 WFW but not yet
31.12.2007 23:19:23 WFW Nope, not over
31.12.2007 23:19:32 WFW Damn you, you will not bad mouth LOTR!
31.12.2007 23:19:40 Kris Who's bad mouthig it?
31.12.2007 23:19:48 Kris I BROUGHT it to you!
31.12.2007 23:19:51 Kris via MSN!
31.12.2007 23:20:17 WFW You're right
31.12.2007 23:20:20 WFW Thank you Krissie
31.12.2007 23:20:22 WFW thank you
31.12.2007 23:20:25 Kris Youre welcome.
31.12.2007 23:20:31 Kris I do what i can.
31.12.2007 23:20:34 Kris As always.
31.12.2007 23:20:40 WFW I know you do
31.12.2007 23:20:45 Kris Sam tearing up...
31.12.2007 23:20:53 Kris So far like agirl...
31.12.2007 23:21:06 Kris Turning into a bitch any second now...
31.12.2007 23:21:17 Kris Merry cries but he's openly gay
31.12.2007 23:21:33 Kris Hugs frodo with one arm and cups him with other
31.12.2007 23:22:38 Kris Frodo kisses Sam. Case closed.
31.12.2007 23:33:54 Kris aaaaaaand LOTR ENDS!
31.12.2007 23:33:58 Kris NOOOW!
31.12.2007 23:34:00 WFW LMAO

My Elfin' Family

My Elfin' Family

Jack

I've got nothing going on in my life and I've got nothing to write about. I am currently watching 24's first season. I saw seasons 2 to 5 but I never saw the first so I'm catching up. Anyway, since Jack Bauer is my favourite TV character ever, here are some fun facts about him.

¤ Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
¤ Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.
¤ Jack Bauer can break anyone and anything, but he will always break the protocol first.
¤ If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
¤ If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
¤ Jack Bauer is the only human in the world with the ability to make Chloe O'Brien drop the personality disorder and patch him through.
¤ When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."
¤ Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.
¤ In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the fuck have you done with your life?